Today I got a chance to do something I haven't done in a long time. I had dinner with my Bio-Mom. Just the two of us. Hubby squired Punkin off to a friend's house after picking her up from school. I was very much looking forward to the dinner.

Bio-Mom and her sister, Buzzy have begun the long process of sorting through the lifetime that has accumulated in GrandDad's house. GrandDad is still living, although sometimes his Parkinson's and old age gets the better of him. His mind is still pretty sharp, though, despite is recent insistence that he has Alzheimer's. More than likely, his trouble getting words out is a side effect from his Parkinson's.

Anywho, one of the pieces Bio-Mom and Buzzy unearthed was their mother's jewelry box. Their mother, Sara Jane passed away during the summer of 1969. She was young, early 40's, and it was sudden. Sara Jane only met one of her grandchildren. Me. I was born at the hospital where Sara Jane worked, and it was already decided that I would be growing up apart from them. From what I've been told, I had the grace and excellent timing to be born after her nurse's shift one night and she spent some time with me, the grandchild that she wasn't 'supposed to' have, that evening. I have been told that she held me.

Being a Mother now, I can only imagine the heartbreak that Bio-Mom felt at her decision. She wasn't forced into putting me up for adoption. She felt it would be best for me. Now I think of the heartache that Sara Jane might have felt and I so wish I could have met her again, hugged her and thanked her for supporting Bio-Mom during those days.

Shortly after finding Bio-Mom I was given a picture of Sara Jane, and instantly received an answer to one of my recurring questions while growing up. Who did I look like? The answer was Sara Jane. The resemblance was strong. I felt an instant connection, and have wanted to know all that I could about Sara Jane since then.

One reason for the dinner last night was so that Bio-Mom could give me a gift, actually gifts. The gifts were items that belonged to Sara Jane, things that were a part of her. With the gifts, I was given a little story about them.

The first gift is a booklet of copies of some of her recipe cards, written out in her hand. Treats she baked often. Bio-Mom's handwriting looks a lot like Jane's.

The second gift is a pair of surgical scissors that Sara Jane used to carry around in her purse. She engraved her name and 'OR' on them. She used these at scissors at work. She used them to remove her children's stitches through the years.

The third gift is a fabric-covered, burgundy heart-shaped box containing a necklace of simulated pearls. It is a triple strand, colored only a little with age. They are definitely beautiful, and have definitely been around a while. The clasp is aged silver. (it may not be real silver, but it is definitely aged) I was also given a picture of her wearing the pearls. Bio-Mom tells me that it isn't a really good picture of her, but I disagree. It is a picture of her in profile, and the resemblance is still there.

I must confess to having a sense of 'Jan Brady déjà vu.' You know that episode where Jan discovers she looks just like some long lost aunt? I get that sometimes when looking at Sara Jane's picture. Then I wish again for the thousandth time that I could give her a hug. This time I would thank her for the gifts, too.

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